Tips for Visiting and Custodial Parents
Tips For the Visiting Parent
Being with your child in the presence of someone else may be uncomfortable for you, at least in the beginning. You probably have many questions and concerns, and that is perfectly understandable. During tough times you may want to talk to a mental health professional or find a support group to help you with your feelings. Do your best to focus on your relationship with your child. Your patience and commitment will pay off. Here are some suggestions that might be helpful to you:
- Read the court order
- Arrive and depart on time
- Avoid discussing the court case or terms of the visit with your child
- Avoid quizzing your child about the other parent's activities and relationships
- Avoid making your child a messenger to the other party
- Say brief and positive good-byes to your child when the visit is over
Tips for the Custodial Parent
Supervised visitation can also be a challenge for you. Typically you have been taking care of your child's everyday needs and have a routine for yourself and your family. Supervised visitation can sometimes feel like one more responsibility. Of course you also have concerns and questions about the visits and how they will affect your child. This is understandable. In difficult times you may also want to talk to a mental health professional or find a support group where you can talk about your feelings. Here are a few suggestions that might help you in the process:
- Read the court order
- Explain to your child where and when the visits will take place
- Have your child ready on time and be prompt
- Reassure your child that you support him or her in having a pleasant visit
- Avoid quizzing your child about the visit
- Avoid making your child a messenger to the other party
What Both Parents Need to Know
If you need to change the visitation schedule, the provider cannot do that for you. To assist you in filing the proper paperwork, contact your attorney or the Family Law Facilitator.
If you cannot agree on how to modify the court's order and you are both willing to meet with a Court Mediator to assist you in reaching an agreement that can then be filed in court and become an order, call your Family Court Services office to schedule an
Supervised visitation can be difficult and uncomfortable at times. Often there are hurt and angry feelings toward the other parent, and it seems impossible to have a positive attitude about supervised visitation. Remember that both of you care about your children, and that, if possible, children benefit from having two parents in their lives.
